Sunday, November 17, 2013

Our First Win of the Season



"Children with high levels of hopefulness have experience with adversity. They have been given the opportunity to struggle and in doing that they learn how to believe in themselves."  - Brene Brown

I like that phrase – the opportunity to struggle -- much more than "fail."

Children who have learned to deal with adversity and have had the ‘opportunity to struggle’ learn a whole host of skills that help them become successful in their academics, their personal lives, their future careers and their relationships with others.  They learn that, when faced with a challenge, they have the skills to persevere, problem-solve, find patience, learn dedication, and ultimately overcome and succeed.

To help set the tone for this season, our team mantra, stolen from USA soccer, is "Respect everyone, fear no one."

Yesterday's scrimmage was good for us.  We faced the top town travel team in our age group in our state. We faced them without fear. The score was 28 to 90. And yet we played on with joy.

As a coach I try to practice patience and allow time and space for players to keep trying, struggling, practicing and eventually mastering the skills. Parenting my own child, I often struggle to find the same patience.

Yet I know that it’s in this struggle that kids learn that, with practice and dedication, they can master something that was initially difficult, such as inbounding the basketball against the press.

One of the reasons that I use a player-lead motion offense is that it gives the players choices. Sure, it will look ugly and chaotic for the next two years or so. It gives our athletes a chance to problem solve. Their self-confidence grows because THEY figure out what to do.

Some times it worked last night. The shifts that ran the motion offense got a lot of shots up. The shifts that ran it without excessive dribbling got quality shots up. Not many found the bottom of basket as we made 14 out of 76 attempts (19%).

I think that the value of players learning to work through hardship is greater than the value of trying to tweak every little thing for the players. They are learning to play instead of learning set plays.

Our girls are learning to adapt, persevere and ultimately prevail on the court which I hope carries over to the other parts of their lives. The win at all costs attitude is what is ruining sports for children. I don't think that I am wired for it. Since my job security is not tied to my win loss record, I will never need to go there.

We have a team where some of the kids have very high goals for themselves while other kids are merely playing for fun (while their parents have high goals for them.) This is "normal." This is one of the reasons coaching a youth sports team is in many ways more challenging than coaching a high school team.

Learning to play, work and compete together in this situation is one of the great lessons sports can teach. I have to help all players understand that everyone has talents they can contribute to our team effort. For me, this effort applies to all areas of the game, from skills to sportsmanship to being a great teammate.

Motivating pre-teen girls to spend their time in becoming better basketball players is a tough task.

Because most of our team is playing up a grade or two and we will struggle, I will be looking for fun things to do as a team away from the court. The girls came up with a great list to get us started. We will add to the list and play through it. I will create social time outside of the gym for the team to come together.

Always keep in mind and help your child keep in mind that games are won and lost in practice; during the preparation. Everyone wants to win. And everyone plays as hard as they can come game-time. But only a few are willing to PREPARE TO WIN. That means the off-season as well as in-season practice.

There’s a big difference between losing and simply not-winning. Last night we did not win according to the score board. But we did not lose either. Every kid improved as the game went on. That is all I expect.

Legendary Hall of Fame football coach Bill Parcells once said, ‘In order to win, you have to figure out what makes you lose.’

During our scrimmage we did not win on the score board because:

1. We could not hit the ocean with a basketball.

2. Our defense has holes in it large enough to drive a tractor trailer through.

3. We could not inbound the ball against the press.

4. The lowest percentage shooters on the team took the majority of the shots.

And yet we are ahead of our development schedule. Of the 14 who played, only one did not attempt a shot. Our team percentage is up 2 points from this summer. One player made 50 percent of her shots. One made 40 percent. Two made 33 percent. Eight players scored. No one gave up.

At this age it is not winning that matters — it’s competing and as cliché’ as it sounds — trying your best. My job is to get the players out of their comfort zone, to push past levels of fear in order for them to understand what their best is.

Once we master the fundamentals - my time frame is 2 or 3 years from now - we will set ourselves up for the best possible chance to win in almost any situation.

This will be an interesting season. Thank you for joining me for the ride.

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